just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Randomize
