dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
