You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
