I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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