whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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