We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Randomize