1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
