Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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