We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize