I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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