i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
You're earring is so big in my mouth
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I feel like death gave me a hand job
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
