Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Randomize