So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
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