bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
