He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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