My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
