just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
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