Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
