Pappa wants mamma naked
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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