Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
