I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
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