True but thats because hes a fetus.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
