its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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