I'm jealous of your bromance
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
