glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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