I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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