It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
