Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
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