Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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