would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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