u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Randomize
