Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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