Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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