ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
