Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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