Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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