Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
