just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize