i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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