If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
he was CRYING into my vagina
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize
