Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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