He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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