dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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