Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
