I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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