He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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