if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
there is puke in my bra ... again
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
