I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize