so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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