dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
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