Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
